IT'S BALI, BABY!

Oh yeah, this is what I'm talking about: it's BOAT day!  It's real down-and-dirty, resort-style living today.  Here's the plan:
Step 1. Get out of bed (because WHY SLEEP!?)
Step 2. Get on the BOAT!
Step 3. Lounge around like a mermaid on the way to the island
Step 4. SCUBA DIVE LIKE A MERMAID
Step 5. Beach, lounge, love life, lunch
Step 6. Lean Into the day that will inevitably be filled with tanning, reading, drinking, and braids.

So, now the truth:
The plan goes off without a hitch, in the beginning.  We drive over this super long bridge with this amazing looking toll booth:

We arrived on this island and it was just as beautiful as every other part of Bali.  I've only been here for about a day and a half, but I'm pretty sure I'm never going to leave.  Just saying.

As soon as we get there, we meet up with our dive instructors and take the quick "class" about scuba diving.  When I learned in Hawaii, they had us get into a pool, but this class was mainly theory based.  I remembered a lot and was feeling pretty confident.  Andrew seemed fine, which was my main concern, but he's almost always fine.

We gear up and go out on the boat to where they are going to drop us.  They have us sit on the side of the boat and fall backward into the water.  Steph goes, then I go, then the boys.  We all bob around until we meet up in two groups: Steph and PJ go with one instructor, and Andrew and I go with another.  Steph and PJ go down with no problem, and Andrew and I take an extra second to get used to it, and Andrew heads down to join up with the other group.  I head down... and immediately shoot back up.  "Sorry,"I laugh.  The instructor smiles and just tells me to try again.  I take a deep breath of air, put my regulator in, and breathe a few breaths above water before going down again.  No problem.  I head down, and the instructor signals me the "OK?" sign, and I signal "OK" back... immediately followed by the sign for "go up" and shoot back up.  Problem. The instructor comes up with me and I continue my nervous laughter.  "I swear, I'm not even scared or anything - I just can't catch my breath!" He assures me it's not a big deal and we try again.  This time, no problem - "OK?" "OK."  Except, problem! I signal, and shoot back up.  I'm starting to get a little frustrated.  "I've done this before," I explain, "and I didn't have any problems then - I just can't breathe, I'm not sure why!"  He doesn't really seem too bothered by it, but I can't stop the nervous babble from falling out of my mouth.  Steph, PJ, and Andrew are completely out of sight by now. I bob back and forth for the next few minutes, volleying between "OK" signals and "GO UP!", unsuccessfully trying to catch my breath.  My brain is totally calm, but my body is having a full-on panic attack.

This panic attack is a very bizarre feeling.  For me, it's an out-of-body experience, except it's incredibly tied to my body.  My brain is aware that nothing is wrong, in fact, I really want to be doing this thing that's causing me so many problems, but my lungs are snapping shut on every inhale as if desperately trying to prevent me from taking in the sea water.  Each drag of air is met by a clamped chest and FEAR! FEAR! FEAR! Finally dizzy from the amount of times I've tried to sink into the water and have shot myself back to the surface, I signal to the instructor that I'm going to just give up and go back to the boat.

We swim back and get to the ladder, but instead of going up, he decided to give me one last go.  He starts going down by holding onto the anchor rope, and signals for me to do the same.  I sigh; I'm definitely up for trying, but it's just not going to work.  I focus on the rope and go down 2, maybe 3 inches.  I'm feeling okay, so I go down another inch.  I decide to check how far I am from the bottom of the boat ladder, and when I look, I'm WAY below - I haven't been going down inches; I've been going down feet.  I pop my ears and, yup, PANIC!! I shoot up again (ugh) but the instructor is encouraged, so I try again.  I consciously do NOT let myself look up this time, and I'm actually able to stay under!  We swim around, but I keep the boat in sight.  I let myself relax a little, and enjoy the bright fish that are everywhere and the amazing coral.  They even have little Buddha and Ganesha statues down there that the fish have adopted as homes. My panic started to come back, but I pushed myself to not give the "go back up" sign.  Right as I couldn't hold out any longer, PJ, Steph, and Andrew came floating back!  We swam around for a little, but had stayed down about as long as my body was comfortable (because of the DROWNING, brain! Don't you get it!?).  Fortunately, everyone else was ready to go up so no one knew that I was about to wimp out.

We take the boat back to the island and are greeted by a Balinese lunch: seafood platters, chicken satay, salads, rices, "shrimp" the size of rodents (sorry that's not very appetizing but I don't eat them and honestly they were pretty freaky).. it was amazing. We spent the day playing some PROFESSIONAL-grade badminton (read: no one was able to keep a volley going past 2-3 hits) and then got on a banana boat.  Yes, those do exist.  The guy tried his hardest to flip us over and dump us out, but nothing could unseat our dream team! Nothing, that is, until Andrew got a brilliant idea to "bounce!" and as we bounced, the driver hit a hard left, and we all drank sea water through our noses.

Warning: do not watch this video unless you are somewhere you can laugh uncontrollably.

We head back to the boat (where Andrew majestically rode in the net and was drenched the whole time) and made it back to the hotel just in time for one of those naps where you're so tired you fall asleep on your bed in your towel after a shower.

We have dinner at the hotel, overlooking the beach and then went to bed.  Let me tell you, we slept WELL.